, I'm not ripping you off.
I've been meaning to do this after my Disney Channel Rant (which was back in May) but I never got to it. Now then without further ado, let the rant of the mighty
proceed. WARNING: If you say you like the show, please give me a good reason why. Otherwise I will not respect your opinion. I'm sorry, that's just me. Let the rant begin.
Ahh, Johnny Test aka the scourge on Cartoon Network. I remember back when it was announced (it was also back on Kids WB, but I only watched Mega Man Battle Network on there, thinking it was based on the NES games) to be on Cartoon Network back in 2008. It looked kinda cool in the promos to me so I took a look at the show and I thought it was kinda good. But I always felt the intro song was ripping off Green Day's American Idiot. The premise was that a kid named Johnny Test lives in a somewhat crazy family that is not your typical household and Johnny goes on crazy but overused excuses for an adventure. I want to talk about the characters first however.
We have Johnny, a bitchy 11 year old who acts like he is fucking 5 years old. Want an example, he has no interest in babes yet. I remember I had interest in chicks when I was 9. He also has a crappy flame styled hair. Hell,
had a better flame styled hair (Sweet Tooth does NOT count). Now we have his sisters, Mary and Susan Test. They claim their geniuses, but the problem. Their experiments fail every fucking time!
are better geniuses than those idiots, and they are completely oblivious to their flaws! Mary and Susan also can be used to decipher Mary-Sue (no pun intened, think about it.) Now we have his talking dog, Dukey (
Not sure if reference to Green Day or named after shit) who is incredibly gay. He sounds gay, talks gay, and acts very, very gay. (I support gay rights, but Dukey just acts too gay. There is only a good amount of gay I can handle with characters). Then we have Johnny's Dad (I have no idea what his name is nor do I care.) Mr. Test is probably the worst dad in existence, even worse than Mr. Krabs or Baron Praxis (he tried to kill his own daughter to gain information about the Underground in Jak II). He never lets anyone do anything cool at all. For example, Johnny has a game, his dad won't let him play it at all (my dad never made me go outside instead of letting me play Twisted Metal or Jak II). He also has a fucking fetish with meatloaf.
Mrs. Test is the only character I can handle, but even she is nowhere near redeemable. I've had enough with these shitty characters.
Now we have the "comedy". In case you are wondering what the quotes are for, then move out of the rock you live under and listen up! The jokes are constantly overused and completely SUCK! (ex: Didn't see that coming) They fucking use that catchphrase CONSTANTLY. Even when you can see what's coming from FUCKING SPACE! The rest is potty humor. (hint: toilet humor is only FUNNY when you do it CORRECTLY!)
Now there's the non-existent excuse plot of the show. Something goes wrong, Johnny uses lab to find a solution, they make a bigger problem, and then they fix it. EVERY! FUCKING! TIME! Might I add this is a rip off of Dexter's Laboratory.
Now for my final verdict. I'd rather play Action 52 and watch Mr. Meaty for 24 hours than watch this. It sucks. This show needs to die now and the world could be rid of this scourge.